Ep001: Inner Voices

In this first episode I share a few thoughts about dealing with the negative voices that prevent us from being who we were destined to be. I also offer tips on strengthening your positive inner voice. These voices impact all areas of your life: your health and fitness, financial status, relationships and personal development. Developing a positive inner voice is one of the best things you can do for yourself!


“Think you can, think you can’t, either way you will be right.” – Henry Ford

Questions to ask yourself before you believe the negative inner voices:

  • Whose negative voice do you hear?
  • Is this a person you trust or respect?
  • Is this a person who knows you and what you want or are capable of doing?
  • Is this a person who truly has your best interests at heart?

Questions to ask yourself before you discount the positive inner voices:

  • Whose positive voice do you discount?
  • Is this a person you trust or respect?
  • Is this a person who knows you and what you want or are capable of doing?
  • Is this a person who truly has your best interests at heart?

Ways to quiet your negative inner voice:

  • Ask and answer the above questions each time you start to listen to a negative inner voice.

Ask yourself:

  • Is the voice telling me today’s truth?
  • Is the voice offering helpful guidance or critical judgment?
  • Do you want to validate the words or thoughts of the negative voice or do you want to prove it wrong?
  • Question whether you are responding to the word “should” or if you are actually making a choice.

Ways to strengthen your positive inner voice:

  • Challenge the voice – Is it speaking the truth? The current truth?
  • Argue with the voice – “You are wrong! I can do this!”
  • Dismiss the voice – “Your opinion doesn’t matter to me.”
  • Remember the positive comments made by someone you trust and respect.
  • Remember that progress, not perfection, is what matters most.
  • Remember that you have the right to learn new skills or change your attitudes and behaviors
  • Remember you have the right to fail occasionally and still be successful.
  • Remember kindness can be more satisfying than being right.

Some links mentioned in this episode:

My Fitness Pal – A free resource to help you monitor caloric intake and exercise. Community message boards allow for interaction and support from people with similar goals, questions, and successes.

Weight Watchers – In-person or online only fee-based weight loss program that encourages healthy eating. An online social community called Connect allows members to ask questions and encourage each other on their weight loss journey. The emphasis is on defining your “why” and learning how to eat healthier so you not only lose weight, but so that you also keep the weight off.

What do you do to silence negative inner voices? Share your best tips in the comments section below.

But you promised…

I had promised myself I would go to the gym on Wednesday after work.

On Sunday, December 4th I competed in the Santa Hustle Half Marathon. My post-half recovery plan was to take it easy on Monday and Tuesday then do a 3-mile run on Wednesday. Seemed like a solid plan to me.

Donna before the Santa Hustle Half Marathon

Donna before the Santa Hustle Half Marathon

But as often happens, something else came up.

Sigh… how many times does that happen to you? You have the best of intentions, you’ve PROMISED yourself that your fitness schedule is sacred time and you will NOT share it with anyone!

And then you get invited to go shopping, to the movies, or a birthday party with a close friend. Perhaps it’s a friend you haven’t seen for a while, or a friend who has been struggling and you want to be available to help.

In my case, I was invited to the retirement party of a dear friend.

For many days I debated what to do. I knew my friend would be well-honored if I was not there. I knew this friend on a personal, not professional basis. I knew that my being there was not important.

My fitness goals, however, ARE important.

The internal debate raged on.

In the end, I opted to postpone my first post-race run to today. I chose to attend the celebration honoring my friend. It was the best choice. It was the right choice.

This event was a once in a lifetime event. It wasn’t something that could be rescheduled based on my needs. I thought it was important to be there, just because Mike is important to me.

When you are faced with decisions about how to use your time, be mindful of those options that are once-in-a-lifetime uses and those which are more common, repeatable, or reschedule-able.

Rarely (although it does happen) do friends intentionally try to schedule time with us that conflicts with our self care time (for fitness, relaxing, reflection). Usually they are not aware of them!

When you have already decided to take that personal time and someone extends an invitation, share the timing conflict. Ask if you can find a different time that works better for both you.

If your friend pressures you, you can always say no (unless it is close to your own birthday, wedding, birth of a child, etc. We don’t want you ruining your own surprise party!).

It is important to keep your promises to yourself. So if you do decide to reschedule your self-care appointment, be sure to reschedule it within a day or day.

If you find this cycle of rescheduling keeps happening, I ask you to consider whether you’ve really made a commitment to your self-care. When things are important to us, we find reasons to see them thru, not excuses to avoid them.

Do you have reasons or excuses? Share your experiences with scheduling and re-scheduling self-care appointments in the comments box below.